I dont write much more for the last 4 months..... maybe one day will come back to write again.
Life has always been an ups and down and treasure every moment of it as it is too short to let it pass by...
Showing posts with label my diary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my diary. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
A cry
It has been a while since last time I cried. I had noticed that my heart became hard like stone. Swallow and chew as it come and get to the bottom of it if I could. There is no vocabulary of tears anymore. But tonite s I sat down to meet HIM and talk to HIM, those precious tears flows like a pipe. To HIM I ask for help for me to go on in life. Sometimes too much to bare that mentally and spiritually I failed to deal. Imperfect human being I am. Added to the moment of upside down hormone fluctuation and my head feels like bursting up in the air. A horrible feeling and it is really uncontrollable. I just cant learn to control the anger during this time. The whole system is taken over by the hormone and it is just so depressing.
A cry is really a good feeling of release...
Anggerik merah
9:54 pm
22/12/2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Go away anxiety
Sometimes anxiety sets in for various reasons. The pressure of getting things done by oneself , for instant, internal pressure and the pressure from other external factors.
Regardless of what cause the anxiety, the most important thing is how to properly manage it. Not allowing it to over rule ones life.
Go away anxiety...
Anggerik M
10:28 pm
20/12/2010
Sunday, December 19, 2010
After a long silence
I have not been writing in this space for almost 6 months. Much thots came to my mind off late and I am saying to myself, it is time to continue writing here again. Perhaps this would capture a deeper thots transferring from space of mind to this space as mean to deposit.
It have been a rather up and down rides in life. But Alhamdullilah, Allah had provided me with all the strength to continue life in various perspective. Waking up at this hour after a rather earlier sleep to compensate with tired body, had put me back on to write on this space. Honestly I had not been writing much offlate. A good and not so good side of it.
The treasure of the moment really have loads of impact on my life. I had let go of the bitter past and adored the sweet memories. That is one accomplishment indeed. However, some thought lingering in my mind about the future and its plan... I have those plans and looking at future not to far down the road as I believe we can only plan for future and we have no clue how it will turn out. Allah would have a better plan for us beyond our knowing. I must confess, at time I was obsessed with the future retirement plan. And I realise there is some part of life that I need to go through first and get it done with. I had not been able to efficiently sort it out within my priority of life as yet. It fall within top priority but it never get to the highest attention in the list. Mind programming is what I needed and a guidance from HIM is what I am needed.
This space will need to be fill-up again. I do not mind what crazy, stressful thot it might deposit. I would rather let it deposits.
I realise offlate, I started to loose a bit of memory. Mine is not as sharp as before...
I wish to live this life with full guidance from HIM and may HE make it easy for me to go through it.
After a long silence...
Anggerik Merah 2010
2:47 am
20/12/2010
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Live day by day
I had not written as frequent as i wish to. This can be an entry for May 2010. I am still clueless what to write...
Pen down
Anggerik
May 16, 2010 4:30 pm
Pen down
Anggerik
May 16, 2010 4:30 pm
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
Clueless thot
I am a bit clueless with what to do things... i.e. with my lil man. I called my old nanny who took care of lil man from small till 5 years old. Thinking that she would be able to come here for a while to help us with lil man. The moment I asked her about how she is doing...I don't have a gut to ask her to be here. I don't think she would do that since she is buzy taking care of her grand children.
I am clueless again. Wouldn't know what and how to move ahead.
For now, yes I remain clueless. I am hurt and sad too... but I never want to let it ruin my life either. So I have to stay calm and compose.
Clueless thot.
Anggerik merah
April 6, 2010
9:45 pm
I am clueless again. Wouldn't know what and how to move ahead.
For now, yes I remain clueless. I am hurt and sad too... but I never want to let it ruin my life either. So I have to stay calm and compose.
Clueless thot.
Anggerik merah
April 6, 2010
9:45 pm
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Something I have to bear
Something I have to bear in life...the feeling of sudden unplug of power supply...
What is Fibromyalgia?
Fibromyalgia produces widespread pain, disturbed sleep, and exhaustion from head to toe. Fibromyalgia means pain in the muscles, ligaments, and tendons—the soft fibrous tissues of the body. Although the muscles hurt everywhere, they are not the only cause of the pain. Instead, the diffuse, body-wide symptoms are greatly magnified by malfunctions in the way the nervous system processes pain.
Regional muscle pain not related to arthritis or the nervous system also occurs in the majority of people with fibromyalgia. Patients describe this as firm knots in the belly of muscles, often causing restricted movement and radiating pain. These muscle nodules are myofascial trigger points and some researchers suspect that these painful areas overlap with the tender points used to diagnose fibromyalgia.
The symptoms of fibromyalgia are unpredictable and most patients are frustrated by their physical limitations and inability to make plans. You may feel as though you have to "push yourself" to get things done.
Most patients with fibromyalgia say that their muscles feel like they have been pulled or overworked, and sometimes they twitch or cramp. Even the skin may feel badly sunburned. To help your family and friends relate to your fibromyalgia symptoms, have them think back to the last time they had a bad flu. Every muscle in their body shouted out in pain. In addition, they felt devoid of energy as though someone had unplugged their power supply.
Given that the symptoms may be similar to a viral flu, experts in the field of fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome believe that these two illnesses may be one and the same. Gulf War syndrome also overlaps with these two conditions.
Common symptoms:
Pain - Fibromyalgia pain has no boundaries. People describe the pain as deep muscular aching, throbbing, shooting, stabbing, or intense burning. Quite often, the pain and stiffness are worse in the morning, and muscle groups that are used repetitively may hurt more. In addition, the severity of regional pains (particularly those in the head, neck, shoulders and lower back) are a strong predictor of a person's overall pain rating. The muscles in these painful areas can feel tight, knotted and rope-like. Pressing on the firm, knotted region hurts and often causes the pain to shoot to other muscles when a myofascial trigger point is present.
Fatigue - This symptom can be one of the most incapacitating for people with fibromyalgia. Patients may feel as though their arms and legs are weighted down by concrete blocks and their bodies may be so drained of energy that every task is an effort.
Memory and Concentration - Difficulty concentrating and retaining new information may seriously interfere with everyday mental tasks. This symptom is referred to as "fibro fog" and may hinder job opportunities. In particular, fibromyalgia patients have serious difficulty retaining new information if they are distracted.
Sleep Disorders - Patients report trouble falling asleep and more importantly staying asleep, but the unrefreshing quality is what makes the disorder much worse than insomnia. Repeat arousals prevent patients from reaching deep, restorative sleep. As a result, the night is spent in "quasi-sleep" and patients wake up feeling as though they have been run over by a Mack truck. An overnight sleep study will likely show repeat arousals with bursts of awake-like brain activity occurring throughout the night, but a specific sleep disorder may not be identified.
Exercise Difficulties - Moderate intensity exercise activates a powerful pain-relieving system in healthy people, but it makes the pain of fibromyalgia worse. This is why initiating an exercise program may make you achy and tired. However, if you do not exercise on a regular basis, the performance of normal daily living activities will start to cause more pain. Rather than give in to the increased pain sensitivity related to exercise, patients are advised to do mild exercise in short intervals (such as five minutes at a time) to keep the muscles fit while not over-taxing them. A study in Sweden revealed that half of the fibromyalgia patients found it impossible or difficult to climb stairs and a majority of patients could not run. Just standing for five minutes was extremely taxing to one-fourth of the patients.
Irritable Bowel Syndrome - Constipation, diarrhea, frequent abdominal pain and bloating, abdominal gas, and nausea represent symptoms commonly found in roughly 40 to 70 percent of fibromyalgia patients.
Chronic Headaches - Recurrent migraine or tension headaches are experienced by 50 to 70 percent of fibromyalgia patients. Most headaches are rated as severe, occur at least two times per week, and often have a migraine component. Referred pain from myofascial trigger points in the shoulder, neck, and head muscles are suspected to be responsible for most tension-type headache and also play a role in migraines.
Jaw Pain - Temporomandibular joint dysfunction causes tremendous jaw-related face and head pain and affects one-quarter of fibromyalgia patients. Typically, the problems are related to the muscles and ligaments surrounding the jaw joint and not necessarily the joint itself.
Other Common Symptoms - Non-cardiac chest pain, acid reflux, irregular heart beat or palpitations, shortness of breath, numbness and tingling sensations, the feeling of swollen extremities, chemical sensitivities, nasal congestion, premenstrual syndrome and painful periods, irritable bladder, interstitial cystitis, vulvodynia (vulvar pain), difficulty focusing eyes, dry or burning eyes and mouth, dizziness or feeling faint, profuse sweating, muscle weakness and balance issues can occur. Fibromyalgia patients are often sensitive to odors, loud noises, bright lights, some foods, and often the medications that they are prescribed.
Aggravating Factors - Changes in weather, cold or drafty environments, hormonal fluctuations (premenstrual and menopausal states), stress, depression, anxiety, and over-exertion can all contribute to fibromyalgia symptom flare-ups.
Anggerik2005
7:07 pm
Feb 20, 2010
What is Fibromyalgia?
Fibromyalgia produces widespread pain, disturbed sleep, and exhaustion from head to toe. Fibromyalgia means pain in the muscles, ligaments, and tendons—the soft fibrous tissues of the body. Although the muscles hurt everywhere, they are not the only cause of the pain. Instead, the diffuse, body-wide symptoms are greatly magnified by malfunctions in the way the nervous system processes pain.
Regional muscle pain not related to arthritis or the nervous system also occurs in the majority of people with fibromyalgia. Patients describe this as firm knots in the belly of muscles, often causing restricted movement and radiating pain. These muscle nodules are myofascial trigger points and some researchers suspect that these painful areas overlap with the tender points used to diagnose fibromyalgia.
The symptoms of fibromyalgia are unpredictable and most patients are frustrated by their physical limitations and inability to make plans. You may feel as though you have to "push yourself" to get things done.
Most patients with fibromyalgia say that their muscles feel like they have been pulled or overworked, and sometimes they twitch or cramp. Even the skin may feel badly sunburned. To help your family and friends relate to your fibromyalgia symptoms, have them think back to the last time they had a bad flu. Every muscle in their body shouted out in pain. In addition, they felt devoid of energy as though someone had unplugged their power supply.
Given that the symptoms may be similar to a viral flu, experts in the field of fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome believe that these two illnesses may be one and the same. Gulf War syndrome also overlaps with these two conditions.
Common symptoms:
Pain - Fibromyalgia pain has no boundaries. People describe the pain as deep muscular aching, throbbing, shooting, stabbing, or intense burning. Quite often, the pain and stiffness are worse in the morning, and muscle groups that are used repetitively may hurt more. In addition, the severity of regional pains (particularly those in the head, neck, shoulders and lower back) are a strong predictor of a person's overall pain rating. The muscles in these painful areas can feel tight, knotted and rope-like. Pressing on the firm, knotted region hurts and often causes the pain to shoot to other muscles when a myofascial trigger point is present.
Fatigue - This symptom can be one of the most incapacitating for people with fibromyalgia. Patients may feel as though their arms and legs are weighted down by concrete blocks and their bodies may be so drained of energy that every task is an effort.
Memory and Concentration - Difficulty concentrating and retaining new information may seriously interfere with everyday mental tasks. This symptom is referred to as "fibro fog" and may hinder job opportunities. In particular, fibromyalgia patients have serious difficulty retaining new information if they are distracted.
Sleep Disorders - Patients report trouble falling asleep and more importantly staying asleep, but the unrefreshing quality is what makes the disorder much worse than insomnia. Repeat arousals prevent patients from reaching deep, restorative sleep. As a result, the night is spent in "quasi-sleep" and patients wake up feeling as though they have been run over by a Mack truck. An overnight sleep study will likely show repeat arousals with bursts of awake-like brain activity occurring throughout the night, but a specific sleep disorder may not be identified.
Exercise Difficulties - Moderate intensity exercise activates a powerful pain-relieving system in healthy people, but it makes the pain of fibromyalgia worse. This is why initiating an exercise program may make you achy and tired. However, if you do not exercise on a regular basis, the performance of normal daily living activities will start to cause more pain. Rather than give in to the increased pain sensitivity related to exercise, patients are advised to do mild exercise in short intervals (such as five minutes at a time) to keep the muscles fit while not over-taxing them. A study in Sweden revealed that half of the fibromyalgia patients found it impossible or difficult to climb stairs and a majority of patients could not run. Just standing for five minutes was extremely taxing to one-fourth of the patients.
Irritable Bowel Syndrome - Constipation, diarrhea, frequent abdominal pain and bloating, abdominal gas, and nausea represent symptoms commonly found in roughly 40 to 70 percent of fibromyalgia patients.
Chronic Headaches - Recurrent migraine or tension headaches are experienced by 50 to 70 percent of fibromyalgia patients. Most headaches are rated as severe, occur at least two times per week, and often have a migraine component. Referred pain from myofascial trigger points in the shoulder, neck, and head muscles are suspected to be responsible for most tension-type headache and also play a role in migraines.
Jaw Pain - Temporomandibular joint dysfunction causes tremendous jaw-related face and head pain and affects one-quarter of fibromyalgia patients. Typically, the problems are related to the muscles and ligaments surrounding the jaw joint and not necessarily the joint itself.
Other Common Symptoms - Non-cardiac chest pain, acid reflux, irregular heart beat or palpitations, shortness of breath, numbness and tingling sensations, the feeling of swollen extremities, chemical sensitivities, nasal congestion, premenstrual syndrome and painful periods, irritable bladder, interstitial cystitis, vulvodynia (vulvar pain), difficulty focusing eyes, dry or burning eyes and mouth, dizziness or feeling faint, profuse sweating, muscle weakness and balance issues can occur. Fibromyalgia patients are often sensitive to odors, loud noises, bright lights, some foods, and often the medications that they are prescribed.
Aggravating Factors - Changes in weather, cold or drafty environments, hormonal fluctuations (premenstrual and menopausal states), stress, depression, anxiety, and over-exertion can all contribute to fibromyalgia symptom flare-ups.
Anggerik2005
7:07 pm
Feb 20, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
life is short
last saturday our officemate left this world to meet our creator. after almost 2 years suffering from esofagus cancer and at age of 53. inallillah...semuga rohnya ditempatkan bersame orang2 yang beriman. life is short. anggerik feb 16 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
The happenings
Life has been on the fast and unpredictable plan again. I guess that is what we call life is a journey. After coming back from Beijing, I had to bear with swollen joints and painful muscle. It was really unbearable. The whole body was so painful. I tried to ignore and fight. My movement is very limited. Obviously It didn’t help just to ignore and fight. I decided to swallow Celebrex for 3 nights in a row. The swollen fingers reduced and the pain lessens. However, I noticed some other side effect of the chemical which can be very deteriorating. I have trouble breathing as if I had asthmatic attack. Chest pain is unbearable. And I stopped relying on the chemical.
At the same time, ayah had to undergo minor surgery for “pastula” to get him prepared for dialysis. I knew mak wished me to be there. I booked a flight for 2 days back to home town to attend to my family for moral support. I was so extremely tired but the fight and the push was there for me to stay up on my feet ignoring my body pain. With 2 days unplanned/emergency leave; I ended up entertaining my official email and making arrangement for meeting etc while I was at the hospital waiting for ayah’s surgery. Not only that I had to take care of office phone call. Life must go on….
Spending 2 days at my hometown really a blessing.. I felt time just went so very slow and very relaxing. A moment with immediate family members having breakfast together was really a treasure for me.
Flying back to KL and up on my feet with work demand, put me back on busy life. I had almost forgotten the pain…or in fact I ignore it. In fact it is still there. During weekend, I went for massage hoping that the pain will subside. It was subsiding for a while and came back to haunt me.
The best part of last weekend was a birthday celebration of my big man at Kunang-kunang restaurant. We were there till mid-night to enjoy the life band and let the time pass.
So many things in my mind..About change of work place/career path, family, life commitment… all come at the same time.. I swallow and move on…and pray for the best… Perhaps more smiling would helps to balance the stress on life journey…
The happenings
Anggerik merah
January 25, 2010
8:16 pm
At the same time, ayah had to undergo minor surgery for “pastula” to get him prepared for dialysis. I knew mak wished me to be there. I booked a flight for 2 days back to home town to attend to my family for moral support. I was so extremely tired but the fight and the push was there for me to stay up on my feet ignoring my body pain. With 2 days unplanned/emergency leave; I ended up entertaining my official email and making arrangement for meeting etc while I was at the hospital waiting for ayah’s surgery. Not only that I had to take care of office phone call. Life must go on….
Spending 2 days at my hometown really a blessing.. I felt time just went so very slow and very relaxing. A moment with immediate family members having breakfast together was really a treasure for me.
Flying back to KL and up on my feet with work demand, put me back on busy life. I had almost forgotten the pain…or in fact I ignore it. In fact it is still there. During weekend, I went for massage hoping that the pain will subside. It was subsiding for a while and came back to haunt me.
The best part of last weekend was a birthday celebration of my big man at Kunang-kunang restaurant. We were there till mid-night to enjoy the life band and let the time pass.
So many things in my mind..About change of work place/career path, family, life commitment… all come at the same time.. I swallow and move on…and pray for the best… Perhaps more smiling would helps to balance the stress on life journey…
The happenings
Anggerik merah
January 25, 2010
8:16 pm
Friday, January 01, 2010
A new year re-union, welcome 2010
A new year re-union with both lil and big man. Both were away for while from our lil house for holiday and work. Obviously the house was far too lonely without a complete family members around.
I was out to pamper myself at Jentayu Spa from morning till noon. Feel good and energise.
Good bye 2009 and welcome 2010.
Anggerik merah
January 2010
9 pm
I was out to pamper myself at Jentayu Spa from morning till noon. Feel good and energise.
Good bye 2009 and welcome 2010.
Anggerik merah
January 2010
9 pm
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Doa untuk Kak Moon
A call to ask her condition...turn to be a cry. She could not hold her tears , so do I while hearing it from her, after she told me that the cancer had been worst than initially suspected. It has spread through other parts of her body. For now, she doesn't want to go through chemo theraphy again.
Please doa for Kak Maimon so that she could continue to be strong in dealing with her predicament.
AM
Please doa for Kak Maimon so that she could continue to be strong in dealing with her predicament.
AM
Monday, December 28, 2009
Escapism
I am all alone at home...both big man & lil man are at Kampung... My escapism to write.... getting back that momentum is a struggle. Sigh...
I am in a jail again...a jail of my mind and thots...
Like my freind said to me ...it is just like a desease...better get rid of it..
AM
Dec 28, 2009
11 pm
I am in a jail again...a jail of my mind and thots...
Like my freind said to me ...it is just like a desease...better get rid of it..
AM
Dec 28, 2009
11 pm
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Warkah untuk sahabat
Salam untuk mu sahabatku…
Semuga hari-hari yang dijalani sentiasa diberkati oleh Nya dan sentiasa didalam landasan yang lurus.
Mulut ini amat sukar untuk menyatakan apa yang sebenarnya tersirat dan tersurat disetiap pertemuan kita. Lalu jari jemari ini mencuba untuk melakarkan dan menterjemahkan sekadar yang mampu. Masih lagi kaku terasa jari-jari yang lemah ini... Sekiranya dapat dilakukan..adalah lebih baik apa yang ada di dalam kotak fikiran ini dapat dibaca tanpa menggunakan tutur kata dan penulisan. Seperti orang bisu dan buta. Yang dapat melihat dan merasa melalui mata hati. Tapi hati ini menagihkan kelapangan, kebahagiaan dan ketenangan... maka biarlah jari ini dapat sekiranya berkata-kata...
Sahabatku..izinkan diriku mengucapkan ribuan terima kasih diatas persahabatan di antara kita. Satu persahabatan yang sebenarnya sukar untuk di tafsirkan. Terlalu banyak yang telah di kongsi sepanjang perjalanan kehidupan ini tanpa disedari ataupun tidak disedari.
Sekiranya perjalanan hidup diri ini ditakdirkan lebih singkat, izinkan diri ini memohon ampun dan maaf sekiranya disepanjang persahabatan ini ada cacat cela dan perkataan yang di luahkan menyebabkan dirimu berkecil hati yang menjadikan diri ini berdosa. Diri ini insan yang serba kekurangan. Kadang-kadang lalai untuk memuhasabah diri disebabkan kehidupan yang terlalu pantas ini. Sebenarnya diri ini masih lagi mencari-cari apa yang lebih penting dalam hidup ini disetiap kali ujian yang diberikan olehNya. Keinginan kita dan apa yang lebih utama didalam hidup kita mungkin juga berbeza. Itulah kebesaran Nya menjadikan pertemuan diantara dua sahabat agar kehidupan ini dikongsi dan dipelajari bersama...
Sahabatku... hidup kita melalui fasa yang berbeza yang kadang kala merubah diri kita yang asal. Ada kelebihan yang kita diberi olehNya, mungkin akan ditarik balik dan diberi kelebihan yang lain. Begitulah perjalanan hidup yang singkat ini. Sesungguhnya diri ini terasa gementar dan takut untuk menghadapi perjalanan kehidupan yang singkat ini. Takut sekiranya hati ini dipesongkan kearah terlalu menjuruskan kepada kebendaan didunia yang hanya sementara sebelum tiba saat dipanggil pulang.
Berlabuhnya tahun yang berlalu dan datangnya tahun yang baru, semuga kita sentiasa dilindungi oleh Nya, dirahmati Nya and hati kita sentiasa dekat kepadaNya, kerana itulah sebenarnya kebahagiaan yang suci dan kekal abadi. Pengalaman yang lalu menjadi pengajaran kepada kehidupan di masa hadapan..
Sahabatku, sekali lagi izin kan diri ini memohon ampun dan maaf dan juga berterima kasih diatas persahabatan ini. Terima kasih kerana memberi kekuatan didalam persahabatan ini dan meluangkan masa yang sekadar mampu. Semuga hati ini diberi kelapangan dan kebahagiaan setelah dapat menyatakan terima kasih diatas perkongsian persahabatan ini seperti matahari yang menyinari kembali hari-hari yang pernah gelap dan dingin.
Semuga kita dapat meneruskan perjuangan hidup ini dengan dilimpahi kebahagiaan yang abadi dan penuh keceriaan.
Salam persahabatan dari,
Anggerik Merah
December 27, 2009
5:41 pm
Semuga hari-hari yang dijalani sentiasa diberkati oleh Nya dan sentiasa didalam landasan yang lurus.
Mulut ini amat sukar untuk menyatakan apa yang sebenarnya tersirat dan tersurat disetiap pertemuan kita. Lalu jari jemari ini mencuba untuk melakarkan dan menterjemahkan sekadar yang mampu. Masih lagi kaku terasa jari-jari yang lemah ini... Sekiranya dapat dilakukan..adalah lebih baik apa yang ada di dalam kotak fikiran ini dapat dibaca tanpa menggunakan tutur kata dan penulisan. Seperti orang bisu dan buta. Yang dapat melihat dan merasa melalui mata hati. Tapi hati ini menagihkan kelapangan, kebahagiaan dan ketenangan... maka biarlah jari ini dapat sekiranya berkata-kata...
Sahabatku..izinkan diriku mengucapkan ribuan terima kasih diatas persahabatan di antara kita. Satu persahabatan yang sebenarnya sukar untuk di tafsirkan. Terlalu banyak yang telah di kongsi sepanjang perjalanan kehidupan ini tanpa disedari ataupun tidak disedari.
Sekiranya perjalanan hidup diri ini ditakdirkan lebih singkat, izinkan diri ini memohon ampun dan maaf sekiranya disepanjang persahabatan ini ada cacat cela dan perkataan yang di luahkan menyebabkan dirimu berkecil hati yang menjadikan diri ini berdosa. Diri ini insan yang serba kekurangan. Kadang-kadang lalai untuk memuhasabah diri disebabkan kehidupan yang terlalu pantas ini. Sebenarnya diri ini masih lagi mencari-cari apa yang lebih penting dalam hidup ini disetiap kali ujian yang diberikan olehNya. Keinginan kita dan apa yang lebih utama didalam hidup kita mungkin juga berbeza. Itulah kebesaran Nya menjadikan pertemuan diantara dua sahabat agar kehidupan ini dikongsi dan dipelajari bersama...
Sahabatku... hidup kita melalui fasa yang berbeza yang kadang kala merubah diri kita yang asal. Ada kelebihan yang kita diberi olehNya, mungkin akan ditarik balik dan diberi kelebihan yang lain. Begitulah perjalanan hidup yang singkat ini. Sesungguhnya diri ini terasa gementar dan takut untuk menghadapi perjalanan kehidupan yang singkat ini. Takut sekiranya hati ini dipesongkan kearah terlalu menjuruskan kepada kebendaan didunia yang hanya sementara sebelum tiba saat dipanggil pulang.
Berlabuhnya tahun yang berlalu dan datangnya tahun yang baru, semuga kita sentiasa dilindungi oleh Nya, dirahmati Nya and hati kita sentiasa dekat kepadaNya, kerana itulah sebenarnya kebahagiaan yang suci dan kekal abadi. Pengalaman yang lalu menjadi pengajaran kepada kehidupan di masa hadapan..
Sahabatku, sekali lagi izin kan diri ini memohon ampun dan maaf dan juga berterima kasih diatas persahabatan ini. Terima kasih kerana memberi kekuatan didalam persahabatan ini dan meluangkan masa yang sekadar mampu. Semuga hati ini diberi kelapangan dan kebahagiaan setelah dapat menyatakan terima kasih diatas perkongsian persahabatan ini seperti matahari yang menyinari kembali hari-hari yang pernah gelap dan dingin.
Semuga kita dapat meneruskan perjuangan hidup ini dengan dilimpahi kebahagiaan yang abadi dan penuh keceriaan.
Salam persahabatan dari,
Anggerik Merah
December 27, 2009
5:41 pm
The Day's Motivation
First, i was dying to finish my high school and start college
And then i was dying to finish college and start working
Then i was dying to marry and have children
to grow old enough
so i could go back to work
But then i was dying to retire
And now i am dying...
And suddenly i realized
i forgot to live
Please don't let this happen to you
Appreciate your current situation
and enjoy each day
... old friend
To make money we lose our health,and then to restore our helath we lose our money...
We live as if we are never going to die,
and we die as if we never lived...
Life is very short, so break your silly ego, forgive quickly, believe slowly, love truly, laugh loudly & never avoid anything that makes you smile.
The Day's Motivation 
When I woke up this morning lying in bed, I was asking myself;
What are some of the secrets of success in life? I found the answer right there, in my very room.
THE FAN SAID.... BE COOL
THE ROOF SAID... AIM HIGH
THE WINDOW SAID... SEE THE WORLD
THE CLOCK SAID... EVERY MINUTE IS PRECIOUS
THE MIRROR SAID... REFLECT BEFORE YOU ACT
THE CALENDAR... BE UP-TO-DATE
THE DOOR SAID... PUSH HARD FOR YOUR GOALS
Carry a Heart that Never Hates. Carry a Smile that Never Fades. Carry a Touch that Never Hurts.
HAVE A PURPOSEFUL LIFE!
Anggerik merah
Dec 27, 2009
10 am
Monday, December 21, 2009
Maal Hijrah & Sleep test
Salam Maal Hijrah untuk semua waluapun dah beberapa hari berlalu. Semuga kita semua dilindungi oleh Allah diatas setiap kehidupan kita di muka bumi ini.
Hari minggu yang panjang disambung dari Maal Hijrah menjadi masa and waktu untuk saya merehatkan diri. Setelah beberapa lama kembali bermasaalah dengan tidur, saya membuat keputusan untuk bertemu pakar. Untuk permulaannya saya di suruh menjalani Sleep Test. Maka saya menghadirkan diri di hospital untuk tidor setelah badan saya di lekatkan dengan peralatan untuk sleep test.
Buat masa ini saya memaksa diri untuk menghabiskan kerja2 pejabat sebelum saya bercuti akhir tahun.
Anggerik M
December 21, 2009
11:50 pm
Hari minggu yang panjang disambung dari Maal Hijrah menjadi masa and waktu untuk saya merehatkan diri. Setelah beberapa lama kembali bermasaalah dengan tidur, saya membuat keputusan untuk bertemu pakar. Untuk permulaannya saya di suruh menjalani Sleep Test. Maka saya menghadirkan diri di hospital untuk tidor setelah badan saya di lekatkan dengan peralatan untuk sleep test.
Buat masa ini saya memaksa diri untuk menghabiskan kerja2 pejabat sebelum saya bercuti akhir tahun.
Anggerik M
December 21, 2009
11:50 pm
Friday, December 11, 2009
Been a while
It has been a while since I last blog. Life has been rather in the fast lane with too many on the plate.
Anggerikmerah
Anggerikmerah
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Teaching skill & being a mother
Last week was a rather focus week for me as I was involved in ensuring the course was running smoothly i.e. the students (company staff) really gain significant knowledge after attending this course. I also served as line trainer i.e delivering course on the first and last day. This was the first time I had ever given such a long course. Talking and stimulating discussion from 8:30 am to 5:00 pm. Brushing up my teaching skill was something that I love doing. Work and knowledge I had gather since 20 years ago which still retain somewhere in my memory box became handy. My mind always reflected several experiences and knowledge I gathered many years in the past. It was just like down memory lane. Although I felt easily exhausted but felt the satisfaction. My teaching skill needs some polishing though.
The course was held in the hotel connected to Hard rock café. I had never been to hard rock café KL… During one of the night, when big man and lil man came to pick me up from hotel, the three of us had our dinner at Hard rock Café.
Weekend was moment to be waited after a week of classroom event. I went for cycling and did house chores. Some moment of tense with my lil man. This makes me feel that I fail to be a good mother. I guest I do not have much patient being a mother of a single child teenager with mild autism. I lost the mother touch and understanding. A good cry really helps to release the emotion. Life is like that… full of challenges... a challenges being a mother
Anggerik merah
November 16, 2009
12:30 am
The course was held in the hotel connected to Hard rock café. I had never been to hard rock café KL… During one of the night, when big man and lil man came to pick me up from hotel, the three of us had our dinner at Hard rock Café.
Weekend was moment to be waited after a week of classroom event. I went for cycling and did house chores. Some moment of tense with my lil man. This makes me feel that I fail to be a good mother. I guest I do not have much patient being a mother of a single child teenager with mild autism. I lost the mother touch and understanding. A good cry really helps to release the emotion. Life is like that… full of challenges... a challenges being a mother
Anggerik merah
November 16, 2009
12:30 am
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Stay back & cari makan
My friends and I had to stay in the office for telecon meeting with UK from 6 pm to 12 midnight Malaysia time. None of us would want to fly to UK for a short one day meeting considering too much on our plate at this point of time to handle in office. Travelling time would be tiring and takes longer time than to be in the meeting. We packed ourselves with 2 sets of pizza for dinner and stay on to participate in the meeting. It was not 100% efficient as compared to if we physically present there. But at least we get to contribute up to 80% would be good enough.
Today, I dropped dead in the morning. My fibromialgia with paint on my left side fingers came back since the last 2 days plus intense migrane. I can't really stand the rainy and cold weather. This easily triggered the problem. Hence my GP covers me with MC today so that I can sleep more and rest more as needed.
I must admit, it is too much workload to handle which in some ways raise my stress level. October and November seems to be very busy month in the office. Many times I promise to take things easy. But with so many official appointment given to me to participate and involve in Leadership team and several capability building initiatives really creates high stress level until I am able to manage it. The term some of us use..."cari makan" sound too familiar to me.
Anggerik merah
Oct 4, 2009 11:28 pm
Today, I dropped dead in the morning. My fibromialgia with paint on my left side fingers came back since the last 2 days plus intense migrane. I can't really stand the rainy and cold weather. This easily triggered the problem. Hence my GP covers me with MC today so that I can sleep more and rest more as needed.
I must admit, it is too much workload to handle which in some ways raise my stress level. October and November seems to be very busy month in the office. Many times I promise to take things easy. But with so many official appointment given to me to participate and involve in Leadership team and several capability building initiatives really creates high stress level until I am able to manage it. The term some of us use..."cari makan" sound too familiar to me.
Anggerik merah
Oct 4, 2009 11:28 pm
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Life without maid
House work is never ending and very repitetive to me. Sinking my weekend with house chores means less time for socialising and resting. We use to have a half day helper to do house cleaning but I am not very satisfied with her work. Many of my things "pecah" because her work style is so rough. I am looking for a new helper which can come twice a week and also doing ironing. Arranging to have one next week.
Yesterday another visit to Jentayu Spa to pamper myself.. The different this time is that I have to bare more than than usual during massage. It shows my deteriorating body after more than a month sans massage. Cycling do help to sweat and improve coordination. Much more work need to be done. I had enrolled myself for Celebrity Fitness Club to be opened next month just walking distance to a new mall. Keeping body and mind in synergy to keep going in life.
Anggerik Merah
Oct 11, 2009
12:17 pm
Yesterday another visit to Jentayu Spa to pamper myself.. The different this time is that I have to bare more than than usual during massage. It shows my deteriorating body after more than a month sans massage. Cycling do help to sweat and improve coordination. Much more work need to be done. I had enrolled myself for Celebrity Fitness Club to be opened next month just walking distance to a new mall. Keeping body and mind in synergy to keep going in life.
Anggerik Merah
Oct 11, 2009
12:17 pm
Friday, October 09, 2009
life goes on...
Still in the mood of raya. Full of Raya gathering at office and during weekend. Meeting old friends, new friends and relatives makes life more lively.
While the office work is tons and tons...never ending. Can't even re-distribute the work load properly. Meeting after meeting, workshop after workshop... make my blood goes upstairs when I feel so tired... Many NO coming from me. Forget about workoholic.... I am not....and struggle to get things done. Some new responsibility is given to me which I could not say NO if I want to stay in the corporate world unless I have other options.
But life goes on... and I am looking forward for weekend...cycling...
AM
3 am
Oct 10, 2009
While the office work is tons and tons...never ending. Can't even re-distribute the work load properly. Meeting after meeting, workshop after workshop... make my blood goes upstairs when I feel so tired... Many NO coming from me. Forget about workoholic.... I am not....and struggle to get things done. Some new responsibility is given to me which I could not say NO if I want to stay in the corporate world unless I have other options.
But life goes on... and I am looking forward for weekend...cycling...
AM
3 am
Oct 10, 2009
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