Is solitude something that we should actively seek or is it to be feared?
We’re so used to filling our days with people and distractions that we rarely consider the benefits and rewards of time spent alone.
(Caroline Roberts, Psychologies Magazine, January 2007)
1. Make time
Fitting alone-time into our lives can be a challenge.
Aiming for a short period everyday:
Even 5 minutes just staring out of the window can be restorative.
If possible, go for a walk or sit in the park.
A treatment such as massage can also provide an opportunity for reflection.
2. Clear your mind
Solitude can help us get in touch with our emotions, but to do this we have to tackle our racing minds.
Simple meditation techniques can help such as observing running water or visualizing a place that makes you feel calm.
3. Let go
It’s pointless spending your precious moments alone dwelling on things you can’t do anything about.
Acknowledge the presence of these thoughts, but try to let them pass through your mind without emotionally engaging with them.
4. Abandon your guilt
Don’ feel you have to spend every moment with your partner or family. Time alone can benefits relationships.
Negotiate with your partner to give each other breathing space.
5. Don’t force yourself
If you find that solitude makes you anxious or sad, there may be unresolved issues. Consider talking to a professional.
Solitude facilitates learning, thinking, innovation and the maintenance of contact with the inner world of the imagination.
(The above extracted from Psychologist Magazine, Jan 2007).
Yes, I had been reading this magazine every month during spare time or at a time when I need to divert my mind to something else other than my technical research. Also it serves as one of the ways to keep myself on positive thinking.
The above tips maybe so trivial to some of us, especially to myself. But sometimes we tend to forget when our mind in the state of irrational for whatever reason. I capture this to remind myself. Anytime anyday if I need a reminder, I can always come and read this entry.
This year is almost ended. I am still reflecting the past and also thinking about my future resolution. Not that only end of the year I does this but I always make it a point to ponder from time to time what had I accomplished for myself and others. To be honest, just recently I started to collect my future dream after being drown into the state of focusing only on specific goal in life.
I reflected those years that I had experience with solitude especially in the last several months. Flashing back many events and challenges I have to face, I focus my brain to keep the entire good one and put aside the bad, ugly on one corner of my brain.
To summarise, this is the life experience I had been through for the last several years.
1. Married woman with a complete family unit (a husband and a son)
2. Single parent with one son
3. Married and single life
These stages of life that I had been through teach me a lesson to appreciate others who have to live their life for certain category, to understand the challenge and how to adapt in different situation.
Many friends do questions me for having to go through these, but sometimes I left with no choice in hand. I have to decide what the best is at that particular time with HIS guidance. This life experience is priceless. I learn to know myself and to be myself and what is important in this life for me.
To my beloved fellow bloggers, wishing you:
Selamat hari raya Qurban & Happy New Year.
Dec 20, 2006.