Tuesday, October 31, 2006

You will think of me..


I woke up early this morning around 4am
With the moon shining bright as headlights on the interstate
I pulled the covers over my head and tried to catch some sleep
But thoughts of us kept keeping me awake

Ever since you found yourself in someone else's arms
I've been tryin' my best to get along
But that's OK
There's nothing left to say, but

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me

I went out driving trying to clear my head
I tried to sweep out all the ruins that my emotions left
I guess I'm feeling just a little tired of this
And all the baggage that seems to still exist
It seems the only blessing
I have left to my name
Is not knowing what we could have been
What we should have been

So Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

Someday I'm gonna run across your mind
Don't worry, I'll be fine I'm gonna be alright
While you're sleeping with your pride
Wishing I could hold you tight I'll be over you
And on with my life

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need'em take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and all your reasons
But you'll think of me

And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we got nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me, yeah
And you're gonna think of me
Oh someday baby, someday

Note: Thanks to all for leaving your comment on my previous entry of "Memory Aidilfitri". I need to take a break again from many things. Enjoy the song.

Wish everyone a wonderful life ahead.

Oct. 31, 2006, 17:50

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Memory Aidilfitri

Celine Dion A New Day Has Come

Being away from beloved family during Aidilfitri is really sad. But have been there many times in the past the experience teaches me to make a choice between to:

enjoy every moment of celebration


allow myself to be drowning in emotional crisis, melancholic feeling

This year, my promise to myself is to enjoy every moment of it. My last Aidilfitri here, alone and away from the loved one.

We (my family friends and I) really had an enjoyable Aidilfitri. After Solat in the morning, we visited most friends in town. Believe it or not..a total of 10 houses we visited from morning until night. Walking around in group with colourful outfit really attract other's attention on the street. The bonding that we have with each other is so very close because of limited circle of community. This make the celebration more meaningful. That is also the beauty of Aidilfitri celebration away from our own country and beloved family.

Deep in my heart, I am not pretending that my mind is not thinking about what my beloved one (especially my lil man) are doing at every single moment. But everytime that thots came to my mind, I showered my face with smile and wonderful feeling to know that they are close to my heart. I kept the feeling in my heart and mind whenever I called back home. It was a countless number of calls. Those calls also transmit an enjoyable moment of celebration for my beloved one from a distance.

In short, all of us enjoy every moment of celebration, our memorable Aidilfitri this year.

I am sure you have a memorable one also waiting to be shared.

Have a wonderful day!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006


Christina Aguilera - Hurt

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
Ooh, ooh

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes

There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I wanna call you
But I know you won't be there

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, oooh

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?

There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, ohh

If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous

It's so out of line
To try and turn back time
I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

Monday, October 23, 2006

Dari Jauh Ku Pohon Maaf

To those who are not able to be back for Raya with family...do enjoy every moment of it no matter where ever you are.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Selamat hari raya & maaf zahir batin untuk semua (PETRONAS video clip)

(Refection from the above two video clips: betapa murninya nilai keikhlasan kasih sayang biar apapun taraf kehidupan di dunia ini)

Ramadhan (terlalu cepat berlalu) akan meninggalkan kita dalam beberapa hari lagi. Semuga kita diberi peluang untuk bersamanya lagi di tahun hadapan.

Syawal pula akan menjelma dan akan disambut dengan kegembiraan. Bermaaf-maafan, kunjung mengunjung..mengiratkan sirratulrahim sesama kita.

(Masing-masing dah dok plan balik kampung, tutup kedai kueh, pasang langsir baru dan macam-macam lagi.)

Begitulah ianya silih berganti tahun demi tahun.

Untuk semua, diucapkan SELAMAT HARI RAYA walau dimana anda berada. Semuga ianya memberi kegembiraan disamping keluarga and rakan taulan yang disayangi.

Kalau ada salah dan silap jangan disimpan didalam hati. POHON AMPUN & MAAF SEIKLAS HATI.

Yang nak balik kampung jauh ataupun dekat...BERHATI-HATI DIJALAN RAYA.
Yang pakai pilot...semuga anda sentiasa tersenyum dalam penerbangan...menanti detik pertemuan dengan yang tersayang.
Yang tak dapat balik beraya bersama keluarga kali ini, jangan sedih-sedih sangat..Kawan rakan kan ramai...

Semuga persahabatan yang murni terus berkekalan. Panjang umur kita jumpa lagi...

Keep smiling, laughing and loving...

Salam sayang dari
Anggerik merah
Oct 16, 2006

pssstt...dah tua - tua boleh dapat duit raya lagi ka?..:-). Errr..baju raya tak kesah sebab boleh recycle lagi. Yang lama pun masih nampak baru..sebab pakai setahun 2 kali saja:-)

Friday, October 13, 2006

TO MY FRIENDS...& happenings

Love is like a butterfly
The more you chase it, the more it eludes you.
But if you just let it fly, it will come to you when you least expected it.

Love can make you happy but often its hurt,
but love is only special when you give it to someone who is really worth it.

So take your time and choose the best.

Love isn’t about becoming somebody else’s “perfect person”.

It’s about finding someone who helps you become the best person you can be.

The true measure of compatibility is not the years spent together
But how good you are for each other

Love is not about “it’s your fault”, but “I’m sorry
Not “where you are”, but “I’m right here for you
Not “how could you”, but “I understand
Not “I wish you were”, but “I’m thankful you are

Heartbreaks last as long as you want
And cut as deep as you allow them to go
The challenge is not how to survive heartbreaks
But to learn from them

How to be in love:
Be consistent but not too persistent
Share and never be unfair
Understand and try not to demand
And get hurt but never keep the anger

It breaks your heart to see the one you love
Happy with someone else
But it’s more painful to know that the one you love
Is unhappy with you

Love hurts when you break up with someone.
It hurts even more when someone breaks up with you

But love hurts the most
When the person you love has no idea how you feel about him/her

A sad thing about life if when you meet someone and fall in love,
only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be,
and that you have wasted years on someone who wasn’t worth it.

If that person doesn’t worth it now, it’s not going to be worth it a year or 10 years from now.

My wish for you is man/women whose love is:

Honest, strong, mature, never changing,
protective, encouraging, rewarding and unselfish


Thanks to my beloved friend, Zelda, for sending me the above.

The happenings:

The weather has been so pleasant today with sunshine. A break from normal days with drizzle and gloomy weather. I love walking around campus just to meet people and breathe fresh air. Mingle with undergrad adik2 and friends from other school is more motivating rather than unproductively sitting in front of my PC in the office during day time. This is so much so during this Ramadhan period to talk about iftar and the plan for Eid celebration, a common looking forward to do rather than smelling coffee and food in my office. Not that I could not stand the aroma...but it make me want to sleep more...

Moreover, there is no peace of mind at all in this small office space during day time which accommodates four of us as people talking, phone ringing, the door opening/closing and everyone is stressful in their own way. The last thing to do is to be in a stressful environment when our mind is already stressful. It is better to avoid if possible rather than to let the mind and body dip into this environment. Visiting and feeding ducks in the campus pond is bliss. I do pass through the pond and have a short stay watching the ducks, swan, goose and birds (I never realise all this while how pleasant it is to have this activity as part of balancing my stressful life!).

I had reached to the limit of productivity (i.e. I am being unproductive) in my living room of my flat. Too much sleep, too frequent calling home, too lonely...too much....etc etc. I had enough of, I would consider, pampering myself for quite a while to get over from my abnormal cycle of body clock which had caused me some unpleasant & quite serious health condition earlier. Make me realise something that I used to do before may not anymore appropriate for me. Obviously, I need some adjustment here and there. But now, it is a must to shift back to my nite routine stay in my office considering I want to expediate my finishing line. Well, obviously my face will look stone and serious again…but this is what I need to get my brain to strive really hard again & maximise its capacity to reach the goal.

Tonite, I met my Turkish fren. We chat abt happenings. It was good to know that she already started working in London last 2 weeks. Her tired face really shows as if she has lost her zest. She told me that she had been under stressful condition especially a few days before her examination last two days. It is so normal and the say: no pain no gain. That is what it takes to move on to finishing line…

To stay determine, loads of courage and finally to FINISH is all matters most.

This early morning as i drove back home, I can see a clear sky, shining of half moon and glittering stars. I stood outside of my flat for a while just to look at the sky...Something abt this early morning which generate a calm atmosphere.. (Gee...I am lost of word to describe it..Anywayyyyy...that is the feeling)....

Oct 13, 2006 4:00 am

Monday, October 09, 2006

Moment of reflection...

Last two days, my mind was brought back to my late grandma. What triggered it?

A moment of reflecting my childhood after Tarawikh prayer at school’s prayer room. I was alone in the woman section. I was early that nite thinking that they will start earlier since the Isyak prayer time has shifted to be earlier. I spent the time to recite several pages of verses while waiting for prayer time. I guess when I am all alone my mind can go thinking and remembering whatever the mind wish until I snap back to present time.

My thought that nite was my late grandmother. She was the one who guided me a lot in spiritual believe. Still remember when I was a little girl even before starting school; she brought me to mosque for tarawikh prayer, Aidil Fitr and Aidil Adha’s prayer with her. Being a little girl, I don’t really understand all of this. What I knew was just to follow what my grandma said and did. Whenever I was tired of following, I just went running around the mosques to kill time with other friends, like a normal kids. Suffice to say that it provide some kind of inner believe which instill inside me.

When I grew up, I always curious about many things and I was always gone against what I was not supposed to do based on religious believe. Finding my own path probably the closest I could describe. Having said that, everytime there was tendency to do too much beyond what was forbidden, it was always an inner voice inside me which stopped it. With my inquisitive mind, I do wonder and I do questions about it. What is it really that hold me back?

No matter what, it was always reflecting to my childhood life, the way I was brought up within family which strictly observed religious believes, even as I grow up, I have to admit, I don’t consider myself so serious follower. But...I am finding my true path..let it be a baby step and keep on progressing little by little...

My point is that, most often than not, the way we brought up does influence our behavior and action.

To my dearest late grandma aka TOK…my soul is with you.. Even we are in two different world, I always ask for your dua for me to be strong to go through all the hardship in my life.

Thank you for showing me all that. And I am missing you much. My prayer is always for your peaceful soul in the other world. AMIN.

Previous entry about "MENGINGATI YANG TIADA".

Monday Oct 9, 2006.