4:05 am. My mind could not stop recalling what happened during the week days. In the midth of dealing with my monthly cycle, I did struggle to prepare for my presentation with only maybe 1/3 of my brain function. Dragging my body and my butt to the chair and let my thought flow thru my brain how to explain the results. Of course I know a lot that I donno know. Yes, you are right, the more I dig out the more I don't understand and the more stupid I felt.
Wednesday morning waiting anxiously for my fellow colleague from my company to arrive. Finally I saw both of them dragging their bag and walk through the door of the building where we will have meeting with several Professors to talk about research activities relevent to our company. These two gentleman I met early this year during my business + pleasure trip back in Malaysia. "F" is a technical man while "W" is a team leader/Project Manager. Both characters fit into their respective responsibility.
Surprised to see them just with their blazer without any warm jacket, they told me that they would be ok because most of the time they will be in the building. I smiled. Now is winter time and you need to really keep yourself warm. They told me that it is too bulky to carry winter coat.
We proceeded with meeting Prof. A. Enjoyed having to spend about 1 hour to tap his view on the his research area. Then proceeded to meet Prof. K and his Team. Spend many hours with them and lunch together. A lot that I learnt from them.
That night, I brought both F and W to my house for Nasi Ayam since they prefered to have Malay cousine rather than western. They enjoyed eating as if if they did not eat for several days. Before dinner, the three of us talk about many things..about the company happening, about children education and behaviour etc etc.. More of ice breaking session. I really felt comfortable with both of them. Of course being the Tuan Rumah, I talked a lot than them while they adapting to understand what kind of life I go through here. F is more talkative, more open and full of face expression, but W look a bit serious, mature, observant, careful about what he want to say and have a very calm face. F is a person that I could easily make jokes with but with W, I have to know how to provoke him to make him give his sweet smile!
We had to call off the day because tomorrow will be a long day for me with my presentation to them and also 7 others rep from different sponsored companies . I called taxi to pick them up from my house but no avail. So I decided to drive them to their hotel and also took them to buy train ticket for their next journey.
I came back to office that nite thot that of going through my presentation, but I was too exhausted. Packed my things and went home to sleep. Woke up in the morning. Dressed myself in a profesional look rather than my usual faded jeans and "selekeh" look. Went to office early and looked at my material again.
Both F and W came to office to leave their luggage and we proceed to join others at the conference room. During lunch I told them that all this people who came to this meeting are the head of technical area in their companies. They have to deal with this problem everyday. A lot that we could learn from them while we are not yet have to face this problem in our country. But the time will come for us soon.
My presenttaion was in the afternoon. It went very well despite of me forgotting about the correct name of the pheneomena that we want to propose for further study. Somehow the name was erased from my brain. The effect of monthly cycle? The good thing was that what I had presented really draw attention to the sponsors and they agreed to allow us to further explore this area which means tons of hard work for me. But they recognised the difficulty...Well, that is what PhD is all about..challenging yr brain, creativity and having lots of luck around.
After the meeting finished, I took my colleagues to the lab and explaining about the facilities that we used for the study. We had a great time in the lab..
I drove them back to town for dinner. It took quite a while to reach town due to heavy traffic. I realised that a lot they wanted to know about me...so I did talk a lot while driving. One of the question was have I ever feel giving up my study. I said maybe 100 times I thot about it especially when I am very exhausted and could not find my way out. But as I get back my energy...I go on endlessly..the cycle goes on and on..I shared with them what had triggered me to go through this..and both of them appeared to be speechless.
At dinner table, I realised I shared a lot about my experience in the company and what contribution I had done which I felt that that was the peak of my career in the company. Always money is not the driving factor but to see things grow and happen gave me great satisfaction internally at that time. I always provoked W to get his view if what I did in the company was right. I knew that he is very mature man although he is not that many years older than me. But I noticed that he did not talk much about it but most of the time so much observed what I was saying. He said for him, he just did whatever that he was asked to do something like just go with the flow. Emmmm...thinking in my mind...ooo no wonder you have such a calm face and I love to see the smile on his face! I told him that I wish I could be like him I mean in term of going with the flow in the company.. However, recognising that everyone has different personality and character...we lead our life as we choose to be..
We parted at the train station and I told both of them that I enjoyed having them here for two days and want both of them to come back in 6 months time for the next meeting. Hope that what they learnt during these two days are valuable and they got what they expected out of the investment on this project. W said to me mission accomplished!